1.      Sharing a room requires flexibility and consideration. Compromise is a saving grace in successful roommate relationships.

2.      All roommates should feel a sense of ownership in the space. Take time to talk with your roommate(s) right off the bat and keep at it. The following questions will get the discussion started:

o        What do you think are the most important things for us to work on as roommates?

o        What type of environment helps you to concentrate effectively (i.e. can you study with music or others in the room, etc.)?

o        Are you a morning or a night person? When do you typically go to bed? Wake up?

o        What are some of your hobbies?

o        What kinds of things do you feel like you're pretty good at?

o        What kinds of things do you feel very passionately about?

o        What kinds of movies do you like? Music? Sports teams? TV shows?

o        What are your views on...........?

3.      Discuss equal access to the computer, stereo, CD player, microwave, TV, etc. no matter who brought them.

4.      Come to an agreement about "borrowing" another's clothes, sports equipment, etc., and if so, under what conditions.

5.      Decide on how late it is OK to receive calls.

6.      Agree on how messages should be taken and communicated to each other.

7.      Decide on some "ground rules" regarding the alarm clock and what happens if someone sleeps through the alarm.

8.      Talk about how you will handle it if one roommate is studying and people drop in for the other roommate(s).

9.      Discuss the guest policy if one of you is gone for the weekend; i.e. is it OK for a guest to use your bed. Make sure you follow Missouri S&T Residential Life guest policies.

10.  Bring up issues directly with your roommate. This shows that you respect them and want to make things work. Be direct and to the point. Once an issue is laid on the table, it'll be easier for   roommates to determine the next steps to resolve the situation. Make eye contact and use "I" statements.

11.  Explore some topics through discussions...........eating lifestyle choices, cultural background, faith life, spirituality, how you celebrate certain holidays, special things you've experienced.

12.  Respect safety concerns by locking the room, not sharing passwords, carrying keys, and following the Missouri S&T policies regarding smoking and candles in rooms.

13.  Encourage your roommate to seek assistance with the RA for referrals for academic assistance, family issues, and behavior issues related to an unhealthy life style.

Source: Roommate Connections, Paper Clip Communications

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